Socialize Sensibly

Written by John Cow on July 10th, 2007

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Here’s a question for the ladies amongst you; Have you ever had a bloke in a bar(n) or club stick around like a fly on cow dung in an udderly annoying fashion because he had too much sour milk to drink? Well they do that because sour milk gives them an excuse to shamelessly show their affection for your moo-ti-licious curves. They over-socialize, just trying too hard to get noticed. What happens to those guys? Smacked in the face and kicked out by the bouncers!

Now try to imagine how the Internet can have the same effect on someone. It’s anonymoos and very tempting to be an attention wh*re, hoping you’ll get your blog noticed by thousands of visitors so you can make a profit of whatever way you’re monetizing your site with. Nobody likes pushy bloggers (read spammers) and people will most likely never return to your blog again.

When you socialize in real life, you behave, follow the rules and show respect and dignity. Blogging is the same, you can ask a person to have a look at your site but not rub their nose in it. Chances are if you ask, they will give you their honest opinion and constructive feedback. If you made them look, they could lie and say they love it only never to return or be just as rude as you and tell you to moo off!

When you socialize, you try to build lasting relationships, learn from people’s input and take your skills to the next level. Have a look at Darren Rowse, Brian Clark or Shoemoney. Those guys don’t flood Digg, Reddit, Netscape and what more with all their articles. They don’t need to because of the lasting relationship they’ve managed to build with their audience, most likely a reader will submit a good post. Like forging strong relationships, blogging takes time and patience. It’s more about giving than taking, especially in the beginning. (This has nothing to do with our mad cow contests by the way!)

Another downside for over using the social bookmark sites is that you can ‘damage’ your domain when youv’e just started out. I have experienced this at first hand because when I started blogging, I also discovered this way of getting traffic to my blog.It ended up getting banned from two of the biggest players with little to no hope of getting unbanned. They simply have no time to hear your pleads and excuses. Socialize Sensible. Oh, if you really don’t give a toss and want to get back to spamming them, I’ve written a small article a little while ago with some tips and tricks.

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17 Comments »

Comment by mahdi yusuf
2007-07-10 20:40:33

well, if you ask me i think its sad, just go up and talk to her like a gentleman, if she likes you she will convey it if not, well nice to have met you. simple as that.

Comment by John Cow
2007-07-10 20:43:01

We believe you missed the point, congrats on the first post though.

Comment by mahdi yusuf
2007-07-10 20:45:46

haha i got the point, just avoiding you considering me a spammer!

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Comment by cooliojones
2007-07-10 21:37:25

:shock: (crickets)

 
 
Comment by Sam Breadstone Subscribed to comments via email
2007-07-10 20:47:52

I don’t think the post was directly about pickup lines :P

Reguardless I agree John, if you get too uppy and in somones face I would say it’s rather annoying, if you ask somone something and they say no. DO NOT ask again! Doing anything too desperate for traffic is not worth the traffic your getting.

 
Comment by joshua
2007-07-10 21:21:05

Agreed. Building a new site is exciting and sometimes that clouds judgment. Then again I am more of a white hat kind of guy.

Comment by cooliojones
2007-07-10 21:41:28

Yes , even though you are excited, there are still etiquette rules you should follow. Spamming and trickery will get you noticed, but in a negative kind of way. John Chow kinda rode the fence when he did some of his famous “techniques,” so you have to be careful. In fact, Savvy Affiliate wrote a great post about that on his site, check it out when you get a chance! I think it’s a must read for every new blogger.

 
 
Comment by Sabrina
2007-07-10 21:35:46

I’m taking my time, advice I’ve gleaned from the afforementioned bloggers.

I can vouch for politely asking, I recently sent John Chow an email with three questions, after I read his post about how to talk to busy bloggers or something to that effect… and he responded with the 3 answers, simple as that, no small talk because it’s not necessary.

Comment by cooliojones
2007-07-10 21:42:18

Sabrina, did you send your questions using his contact form?

2007-07-11 04:01:07

I did, I did…and was surprised he took the time, but glad he did!

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Comment by John Cow
2007-07-10 21:50:59

We fully understand what he means, every morning we wake up and have a gazillion emails and comments to sift through.

 
 
Comment by moneygod
2007-07-11 01:34:16

John Cow, this is not your first blog, is it?

Comment by John Cow
2007-07-11 07:31:32

No, it’s our second :)

 
 
Comment by Personal Blog
2007-07-11 02:02:27

If we shouldn’t give our articles at sociable sites then it’s tough to get out there isn’t it? I guess it’s plane hard to get started unless you come up with a clever idea.

 
Comment by Russell Wagner
2007-07-11 05:09:08

Very nice post. I infact am trying to get alot of visitors by not living by Digg or social network websites.

 
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